How To Stop Failing At Journaling

I have to be honest - the title is clickbait, mostly because I don’t actually think you can “fail” at journaling, but I do think that most of us think that we do. I have stopped and started journaling so many times over the last few years. Each time I started for a different reason and stopped for a different reason.

The most harmful perspective we can own when trying to journal is that there’s only one way or one reason to do it. Each of us are navigating so many different lived realities at any given moment, if journaling is a tool we’re using to navigate those times then it’s bound to be as unique as our circumstances are. It can feel like because there’s a label for it “journaling” that it should be as structured as “eating” in that you do it at a specific time and for a specific amount of time.

Right now my latest stint at journaling started back in October during our move and has been pretty consistent since then. I started my latest journal on my 28th birthday and used it as a ceremonious new beginning.

I invite you to also start over today, tomorrow, or this weekend if that feels right for you. Or to fold these tips into your current practice if they make you feel better about your regular journaling.

Decide why you’re journaling

Before you dive into the Target office supplies aisle, think this through the most - why are you journaling? Is it a way to touch base with yourself every morning? Are you using a journal to capture your thoughts throughout the day as you build out a new project? Is it an end of the night routine to track progress, growth, and trial and errors? Clearly stating to yourself that “I’m journaling because….” means that you can get the right notebook for the task, you can mentally bucket out time when it’s most relevant for you. My goal for you here is to realize that your journal is essentially the other half of a relationship. You need to build it on your terms and in a way that makes you feel good about yourself. If you don’t know why you’re journaling yet, then give yourself time to pay attention to your own habits. Buy a journal and try to write in the morning, if that doesn’t fit but you find yourself wanting a page to turn to in the middle of the day just to jot down some thoughts, listen to what that’s telling you about the void you’re looking to fill.

Set yourself up for success from the get

In her book Amy Poehler said something along the lines, “great for her, not for me.” Take those words and run with it when it comes to journaling. You’re here to set yourself up for success and it turns out that success for you looks a lot different than success does for the neighbor down the street. Buy your favorite pen, get a notebook with the perfectly sized lines, download an app for journaling if you’re more comfortable typing into your phone than writing into a notebook. There is no judgement in the journaling game if what you actually want to do is build out a habit that grounds you.

Don’t punish yourself for “doing it wrong”

If there is no “right” way to do it then there is no way you can do it wrong. I’lll say it a little louder for the people in the back — there is no way you can mess up journaling. You have the freedom to work it into your schedule whenever you see fit and to write whatever you want when you do sit down. I know sometimes the hardest part is getting started, especially if you have previously framed not writing as a failure, but the baby steps are the ones that can put you on the right track. Write a sentence about how you felt about your day. The next day write a paragraph about a dream you had. The day after that write as much or as little as your heart desires. I don’t believe in harsh criticism being a motivator for positive, healthy habits. Instead of coming down on yourself, use those moments as a map for how you can be better serving yourself.

WRITE WHATEVER YOU WANT

Journaling shouldn’t be considered an assignment with a theme or topic. It’s your mind getting dumped out on paper. Lately, I’ve been doing a mix of journaling and the morning pages (3 consecutive pages of brain dump every morning) and I can now confirm that there’s always something to write about. Sometimes all the pages are include lists of positive affirmations, what I want for dinner, or how I’m feeling about my dog. I don’t discredit any though because my own personal mantra is that I need to think it or write it down in order to get to the next one and who knows if the last thought is the one that led to that epiphany I was searching for. Try not to judge your process, simply choose to notice it.

If journaling isn’t fun, healing, a moment of pause for you, or generally filling your cup, don’t do it. Kind of like faith, we all find God in different places, so too with journaling. It’s okay if journaling isn’t the right vehicle for your thoughts, maybe songwriting, voice notes, or talking to a friend is where you find that solace.

If you do love journaling, what’s helped you?